You've met a wonderful man and you can't help it but visions of engagement rings and a beautiful wedding have been dancing in your head. You want a future with this man because your heart is telling you that he's definitely the one. It's a great feeling, isn't it? To know that you've found the one man you're destined to live your life with. There's only one major glitch in your plan for an ideal future. He's not interested in a serious relationship. You've tried in vain to change his mind but you've reached your wit's end. Is it possible to get the man you love to want to be with you? It certainly is. You just have to know how to subtly persuade him to want to commit to you as much as you want to commit to him.
If he's not interested in a serious relationship and he's made that clear to you, it's vitally important that you determine why that is. There is a reason for his refusal to take the relationship to the next level with you. Perhaps he was so deeply invested emotionally in his last relationship that he's still healing from that. Maybe he was witness to a bitter and long winded divorce in his own home when he was a child and he doesn't ever want to allow himself to risk being in that position. Think long and hard about each conversation you two have had about commitment and his reflections on that. You can also find clues in other things he says and does. If he comments on how his married friends have lost their freedom that's an indicator that he likely believes men lose their own sense of identity once they commit.
If you've tried talking to him about his reservations to commit, you need to turn to actions to persuade him. Unless you change the dynamic of the relationship you can expect things to stay as is for the foreseeable future. It's not advisable for you to end the relationship with him completely. If you do that you'll risk him finding someone else. It's better to pull back slightly and stop playing the role of committed partner to him if he doesn't see you as such.
Easy and effective ways to do this are to spend more time with your female friends and less time with him. If you have some vacation time approaching, plan a getaway with friends or family members but not with him. Also, stop consulting him about any major life changes you're considering including changing jobs or moving. If you show him that you are taking on more of an independently single attitude he'll realize that there is a chance he may lose you
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